This is a fun thing to be but it didn't come easily.
I was incredibly shy and timid as a little girl. I never wanted to join groups. I was happiest alone, and as I grew, with a book in my hand. I learned that I was too moody and sensitive through the teasing and frustration from my family.
It wasn't a conscious decision that brought me out of my shell. Some part of me understood that I was not valued for who I was and I needed to become something else, so I did. By the time I was in grade 8, I had become a sly class clown, able to make my classmates crack up whenever the teacher's back was turned but look angelic when they were paying attention. I was smart and wanted good grades so I always agreed to be the leader for group projects. In my teen years, I held court with amusing stories, witty comebacks, and a ready laugh. I was the life of the party.
It was a slow journey back to the quiet introvert of my true nature. I started to realize how much peopling exhausted me and how much I hated being in charge, being the centre of attention.
I value that time in my life because I learned a lot about how to be with people. I learned I could relate to others well. Now that part of me emerges as a willingness to go along with suggestions and make things happen when no one else takes charge. I'm grateful that I know how to make people laugh and puts them at ease. I treasure my introverted soul, but I think it's pretty cool to be able to be fun, too.
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